Part one

When I'm fine but not okay...

When everyone's looking at me and I have the biggest smile on my face and I'm happy

When the whole time I'm actually not

When my mind never gets off the high and there's always a lot running in

When I'm failing at keeping myself happy but I seem to be great at making other people enjoy the moments

When I'm tired, exhausted and drained of all this- when it just doesn't make any sense

What happens

When I don't want to go home?

When I really don't know who to call?

When I can't stand myself?

And it's not cliché but this overwhelming slap of reality that I'm really alone

That I have a lot of figuring stuff out I have to do

What happens when a flower wilts away before it even blooms?

What becomes of me

When I'm also not enough for myself just as I'm not good enough for the world

Do I waste away

Is this the dark side of me people see

And I wanna get lost ...lost in-between the lyrics of songs

Lost in between my breaths when I'm taking a shower

Lost in between the seconds of smelling the aroma of food and having the first bite